4 BASIC WAYS TO GROW YOURSELF

 

GOAL SETTING

A woman who loves self-growth enjoying the beach/ Credit/ Felix Mittermeier

Summary

Ø Self-growth traces its roots in human developmental psychology

Ø Its built on the pillars of self-actualization and self-determination

Ø Self-growth is motivated by the natural curiosity found in all human-beings

The most prominent psychologists who have advanced the concept of self-growth include Kurt Goldstein with his 1939 theory of self-actualization, Abraham Maslow five-level hierarchy of needs pyramid (1943), and Carl Rogers theory of growth potential, which he advanced in 1961. Self-growth has its roots in all these theories. And this has to show you that self-growth has been in existence for a long time. Further, you are not crazy when you desire or demand more from yourself. In fact, according to psychologist Kurt Goldstein, self-growth is a drive to realize one’s full potential. Therefore, growing yourself is the primary way to realize that full potential in life. Growth is actually one of the motivations that drives job satisfaction among many employees. And that is why Maslow ranked growth need at the top of his five-level hierarchy of needs pyramid; as one of the leading career motivation employees seek in their work.

For growth to take place, you must be your real-self. This is according to psychologist Carl rogers. And it is true. You must be yourself to effectively grow. You must shed off all filters. You need the real you and your needs. Self-growth is a personal goal and journey. And each human being differs from the other. Your growth goals are not the same as your neighbor’s or sister’s. It does not matter how close you are with your friends or relatives. Your growth needs are not the same. That is why it is very important to pursue your growth based on your own needs. You can only achieve your full potential by assessing your life correctly. When you assess your life. You identify things that are currently missing in your life. Once you identify the missing thing. The missing things become your needs. This is where you draw your growth desires. And we have identified four important ways to grow yourself.

Set Your Growth Goals

You cannot grow yourself unless you know what needs to be grown. The mere fact that people differ from each other; also means our growth goals are different. Some people can have context-based growth goals such as, pursuing a second degree or other academic desires. Other people will have need-based growth goals. Goals aimed at changing certain behaviors around their lives. Regardless of which category you fall between the two. Growing yourself is an individual process. You identify your growth goals and establish clear paths to achieve them. If for example, your growth goal falls on the context-based growth. Your growth in the academic category have to be set. You need to identify the academic need you have. You have to settle for an academic program, which you think will fulfill you in the most refreshing manner.

A program that will launch a new you to the market. When you pursue any form of self-growth. You are looking to achieve or maximize your full potential. As a result, you want to engage in activities that bring out the hidden fire in you. And the goals you set go a long way in bringing or not bring out that hidden fire. Therefore, to identify the right growth goals, you must spend time in reflection. You need to understand yourself. You want to know whatever is missing. You need to name whatever is missing. Your growth goals must be realistic. They must narrow down to exact things that you want to attain. Things that will make you ten times better than who you are today. Don’t rush the process. Take your time to understand your needs. You want to make the most out of your life. And you would like to do so meaningful by doing things that bring satisfaction and joy.   

The fact that desire to grow yourself is a basic foundation of your being means that growth desires come from within. You must tap them from inside you. You just need to find time and understand what is going on inside. Your curiosity for growth are genuine. And they affirm that you are a normal human being. So harness all these innate energies and set the correct growth goals. Whether need-based or context-based growth. Ensure your goals capture the correct need. Self-reflection will play a significant role in bringing up different needs. Settle for the needs that best define your growth desire. Identify the activities that need to be done to meet these goals. Determine if you have what it takes to meet the required demands. As much as, self-growth is an individual process. At certain points you might collaborate formally or informally. For example, to acquire an academic need. You will have to work with learning institutions. And that means finding time and money to fulfil this growth desire. Be ready for the sacrifices that come with your growth needs.     

An individual choosing a growth lifestyle. Photo/Taryn Elliot

     Think Long-Term

Growing yourself is not a one-time show. Growing yourself is a life-long commitment. The growth that you are seeking is not one-time. The growth will benefit your life today and in the future. The degree that you acquire will change every aspect of your life if you decide to implement it. You will have a new career. New knowledge added to your existing knowledge. And you will be a whole new person who is capable of so much more. That so much more is when you realize your full potential. When you realize that you can be more than what you are doing today. You find activities that challenge you to produce that more in you. So think long-term with your growth desires. The changes you seek are life-long. The emotions you would like to work on are life-long. If for example, you have anger issues and you tackle that as one of your growth goals. Eliminating anger in your life makes you a better person overall.

It makes you emotionally stable. And this stability contributes to your growth. You learn to control yourself in circumstances where anger could have taken over. When you improve on this issue, you change your overall life. You unearth a different potential that you did not have before. You mature emotionally and that means handling difficult conversations without lashing out or fighting with other people. Thinking long-term helps you to plan your growth effectively. It teaches you that whatever growth you are seeking will not be over night. As a result, you will have to invest time, energy, and money to achieve the desired growth. Thinking long-term leads you to commitment. You learn to get committed to your growth desires. Academic achievement takes time. You will have to commit to your studies to graduate.

Fixing any behavior-related need takes time. Anger is a strong emotion. So it will not come out just like that because you want it out. You will have to commit and work hard. You will have to collaborate with other people to help you alleviate it from your life. You will have to commit to become better. What all these mean is that you will have to work hard to achieve any growth you desire for yourself. Whether you go it alone or with other professionals. Your effort will be needed. You will not solve your growth problem unless you find time. Present yourself and be available to grow. Therefore, self-growth as much as it is an individual process is not simple. The mere fact that our growth goals differ does not necessarily mean that you will have an easy way. Choosing what you want is liberating. However, committing to achieving what you want is not easy. You will have to sacrifice.

A beautiful beach with growth opportunities. Photo/Pixabay

Believe in Your Goal

Take courage from Carl Rogers and believe that you can achieve any growth goal you have. In one of his observations in his theory of growth potential, Carl observed that every individual can achieve his or her goals. If you believe that you can be more, then you can achieve that. You have to commit to full self-actualization. You must pursue your growth with intentionality and focus. You know why you want to grow. You know what that growth will do for you. The self-improvement that you are looking for through self-growth will impact your life in the most interesting way. Improving yourself will make you feel better. The good feeling you will get from achieving a goal will impact your whole life. Your life will become better. Your confidence, energy, and health will all improve. That is why you need to take growing yourself very seriously. You have to believe in the goals, desires, and wishes you make about yourself. Nothing is complex if you really need it.

You are among ‘every person’ that Carl Rogers described that can achieve his or her growth goals. You only need to find your growth goal and prioritize it. Believe in it and work hard. Self-growth is the best way to improve yourself because it taps from your inner curiosity. Your growth needs are inherent. And that means you only need to cement your growth by putting in the work. Some of the work you need to put in, is to believe in your desires. Have confidence in your journey. Believe that you will achieve your desired growth. And that you will become better and more. Believe that you can get to your full potential. That you can improve any area of your life and live the life that you want. When you put your growth goal into your mind. You eliminate some obstacles. If you mind can perceive your growth goals and see them as possible. You have nothing to fear. Your mind will push you to success. So believe in your growth goals and grow any aspect of your life.

Open Up to Your Experiences

This is what helps you to grow. The experiences you have gone through life. They shape you in the most fundamental way. These experiences have the potential to change you. Therefore, when you open yourself up to these experiences. You learn a lot. Experiences teach you a lot about life and people. You need to acknowledge that and use them as your learning curves. You see a lot of things around your life. The things that you see can easily influence you in the right or wrong direction. You must be careful. The mere fact that every other person you know is doing something, does not necessarily mean that you should also do it. Your experiences teach you how to respond to situations. So, learn from them. Allow them to materialize in your life. Acknowledge each one of them. And allow those experiences to shape you.

Your most painful experiences teach you how to avoid threats. They help you to understand people or trigger points. This experiences become important life lessons. You can escape a lot of danger by tapping into your experiences. You can learn a lot from your experiences. Growing yourself means acknowledging these experiences. Knowing the role that experiences play in your life is very important. Your growth does not only come from incorporating new practices and processes. Your growth also comes from things you have experienced yourself. Things that you have witnessed and tasted their impacts on you. For example, bad experiences help you to avoid. People and things that bring pain to your life. Positive experiences connect you with good things that you want in your life. And the more you learn about the good things that you want, the more you lean into the practices and experiences that bring you satisfaction.

Therefore, part of growing yourself is opening up to your own experiences. Allowing your experiences to guide you on which areas in your life you need to improve. The behaviors that you need to let go and the new practices that you need to embrace. You have definitely come a long way to desire growing yourself. Don’t let experiences that you don’t like in your life stand in the way. The triggers that make you feel inferior or not enough should not deter you. Instead, recognize these triggers and use them as stepping stones. See them as some of the areas that need work. You cannot live your life to full potential if, you have reservations. You need to get to every reservation by going through your experiences. Evaluate all of them and discard those experiences that no longer serve you.

Move forward with feelings and thoughts that empower you. The fact that you are looking for growth means you are looking for circumstances and things that build you. Things that bring the best in you. Not things that discourage and make you look less. Leverage on all your experiences and become better. Grow those areas that need growth. And take your life to the next level. Remember to focus on your growth goals. They are your personal needs and the most important goals. Work on them. Don’t mind other people. Focus on your growth goals because they define your core growth areas. And this growth journey is life-long. So don’t be in a rush. Enjoy the journey and commit to everything that makes you better.