5 TIPS TO SELF-IMPROVE AS A WOMAN

 

CULTIVATING GROWTH MINDSET 

An excited woman celebrating self-improvement/Credit/Anna Shvets

In Summary

Ø The patriarchal system has conditioned women to think that they need to do more.

Ø That they are not enough just the way they are.

I love today’s topic because it will be debunking a lot of misconceptions about women. In the following five tips to self-improve as a woman. You will learn that you don’t need to do more. You just need to be yourself. These are my best five tips to self-improve as a woman.

Ø Stop Comparison

Ø Make Mistakes

Ø Your Value is not in the appearance of your body

Ø Let Toxic People Go

Ø Trust Yourself

Stop Comparison

Women carry a lot of pressure. They are not only expected to fit in a certain threshold to be considered beautiful but also prove their worth. The patriarchal society has created obstacles for women. Obstacles that trap a lot of them. Women are conditioned to think that they need to constantly do more. Even in circumstances where men fail. A woman is expected to perform a miracle. For example, in households where irresponsible men come from, a woman is expected to fill the gap. She is supposed know how that household makes progress. She is supposed to find food and see to it that everything in that household runs, even when someone is failing. Most women have fallen to these wicked traps. Traps that constantly pushes them to do more for others not themselves. This is wrong. As a woman, you don’t need to prove anything.

You don’t need to do more. You just need to be yourself. And part of being yourself is to become the person that you want to become. Forget about what the patriarchal system says. Forget about what society says and thinks about you. Focus on being the person that you were created to become. You have a lot of potential as an individual. Potential to become anything you want. Don’t accept limits. Don’t accept other people to define you. Define yourself and go after the things that matter to you. In addition, quit the idea of comparing yourself with other people. You don’t need to fit in a certain category of beauty. You don’t need to do more to appear relevant. You just need to focus on being you. You are exceptional as an individual. You are enough as a person. You don’t need to add any extra burdens.

Therefore, to effectively self-improve yourself. Stop comparing yourself to others. You don’t have to dress, talk, or act as other people. Instead, you need your freedom. Your space to discover who you were meant to become and the impact you have for the world. This is very important. You have something that only you can have. And when you start comparing yourself to other people and women, you risk losing your specialness. Your identity. There is nothing as unfortunate as, living without an identity. And when you compare yourself, you discredit your own being. You dishonor your worth. You think that you need to look like so and so to matter. But that is not true. You are enough as you are. You matter as you are. Tap inside and aim to live your potential. Allow your own light to shine.

Live your own life. Have your own values. Dream your own dreams. Love yourself. Don’t live a lie. Find your own strengths and weaknesses. Be aware of yourself. Other people should not determine how you act and live. You should live the way you want. Do things you love and enjoy. You don’t have to draw your strength or identity from other people or things. As such, the biggest lesson that you will learn as a woman is to stop comparing yourself to others. This is your biggest self-improvement. When you learn to overcome comparison. You will find freedom and that freedom will give you the life you deserve. You will strive to know yourself and things that matter to you. Moreover, you will stop caring a lot about what other people or society thinks about you. Your energy and focus will be on you. And that is what you deserve. To find your voice and listen to it.  

A courageous woman carrying out her self-improvement. Photo/Karl Solano

Make Mistakes

Make mistakes. This is the best way to self-improve. Allow yourself to make mistakes. You are a normal human being. And there is no normal human being that does not err. Even the smartest humans make mistakes. You are no exception. This is not to say that you should normalize mistakes in your life. No, that is not what I am saying. What I am saying is that create room for growth. The best growth with life-long lessons come from mistakes. When you learn the impact of a mistake, you learn to think better. You become more conscious. You become more careful. Your wisdom grows through the lessons. I know as a woman, making mistakes can be costly. However, you don’t need to be afraid. You don’t need to be upset when you learn that you made a mistake. Instead, let reality check in. You are not a fool.

Mistakes shows that you are normal. And sometimes, somethings are way beyond your control. You did your best. But life happened anyway. Give yourself grace. Mistakes are not weaknesses. They are learning opportunities. Embrace these opportunities. Be open-minded about them. Learn their sources. Assess those mistakes. Seek to understand how they happened. Learn from the scenario and focus in the future. You will be a much better person tomorrow. The mistake that you make today could shape your tomorrow. You will be a much better thinker tomorrow than yesterday. Open up yourself to these lessons. They will make you better. Don’t worry about what other people will say. Worry about your mindset. Your perceptions and interpretations of mistakes. What do mistakes mean to you?

Do you see them as opportunities or weaknesses? When you realize that you made a mistake, how do you feel? Dejected and beaten down or you acknowledge the mistake? Your mindset determines how you navigate out of mistakes. I have seen some women shrink and withdraw. That should not be the attitude. You should not be afraid of making mistakes. You should instead, embrace them. Give yourself permission to make them. Don’t allow them to confine and throw you out of proportion. See mistakes as learning opportunity. Your learning opportunity to think and choose better. It is your second chance to get it right. It is your second chance to be more careful. It is your second chance not to trust everyone. Learn from your mistakes and allow them to make you a better person in the next season.

Your Value is not in the Appearance of your Body

Understand this very clearly. Your value is not in your appearance. Your value is not in the complexion of your skin. Your value is who you are as a person. You are valuable just the way you are. You don’t need to do anything extra. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone. You just need to know that you resemble someone powerful. And if you are a reflection of a powerful person, you are also powerful. Internalize that reality. Live that reality. You are as powerful as your maker. There was no mistake.  No one made mistake to make you that way. Understand that too. You are enough. You are worthy as you are. Don’t worry about your body or appearance. Accept yourself. You are worthy the way you are. When you accept and make peace with who you are, you get healing. You grow. You become what you were supposed to become.

A young woman growing in confidence after improving herself. Photo/Moose Photos

The limitations that society and stereotypes place on you are not your definition. They are just what they are, limitations. Deflections that are meant to distract you. And if you become careless, you risk losing yourself. You might not tap into your worth. Your worth is inside you. You just need to open up yourself and see what is inside you. To self-improve as a woman is to also know that you are valuable. And your value is not based on things. Your value is who you are as a person. Your contributions are unique. Your thinking process is unique. Your knowledge and wisdom is unique. And that uniqueness is needed to make the world better. You have your place to make impact. You are needed to make impact. Go after the impact and power you carry. Forget about appearance of your body or complexation. No one should box you. Don’t fit yourself in a certain spectrum. You are a wholesome person with a lot of potential. Tell yourself, it is the potential you carry not the appearance or complexation. You matter just the way you are, big, small, fitting, not fitting, or anything else. Your value is not in your body. Your value is you, the individual.

Let Toxic People Go

You have a long way to go. You have a lot of things to do. And you don’t need extra burdens on the way. If some people no longer fit in your values, let them go. You need to know when to let go. It does not matter how much you love these people. If all they do is drain and make you feel bad, let them go. Don’t keep people that feed you poison. People that cannot see anything good in you. People that want you to always show up for them. They have burdened you with their issues to an extent that you cannot make progress. You need to make decisions about these people. You would rather live without friends than keep people that have no value to you. You will know when people no longer have purpose to you. Walk away from these people. Choose yourself over toxic people. Place your needs first. If they don’t fit into your needs, they don’t deserve you.   

Don’t entertain toxic people. It does not matter how long you have known them. You don’t want to work with people who take advantage of you. People who steal from you. People that can easily point an enemy in your direction. You don’t want those people. Your work as you seek to self-improve as a woman is to identify these people and end those relationships. You cannot achieve self-improvement if, you keep holding unto things that are not working. The essence of self-improvement is to downsize. To do away with things that no longer serve you. Things that come across as costs. Your energy deserve better engagement. You deserve good treatment. When that respect no longer exists, let people go. People that don’t respect your space. People who think their needs are more important than yours. And when you need them they are not available. Life has run its course. Let toxic people go.  

Trust Yourself

Trust yourself. You have what it takes to make great decisions for yourself. You know yourself very well. Trust you. Make decisions that serve you. Great decisions that result in progress. You are capable. You have what it takes. Trust yourself. Think for yourself. Make decisions for yourself. Make decisions that serve you. Don’t drive your identity and energy from others. You already have your truth and identity. Tap into it. Live it. Trust yourself. You are an equal opportunity decision maker. Make decisions that serve you as a woman. Make your self-improvement. Self-improve yourself using your empowered voice and decisions. Trust your abilities. Trust your capabilities. You are good enough. Don’t doubt your abilities. When the time comes make those decisions with confidence. Make progress. Live a better life. Get rid of things that you don’t need. Think about those things and eliminate them.

As a woman, you are a powerful resource. You are capable of so much more. You are more than what patriarchal system think you are. Don’t do more. Do more by doing less. Remove everything that does not benefit you. Make decisions that empower you. Be your own woman. Trust your abilities. Self-improve yourself. Become the person that you want to become. Go after your progress. You deserve the best. You are the best. Find where your best lies and live it. Don’t accept limitations. Don’t allow systems to define you. live your potential. The dreams and goals that you have in mind are what matters. Go after them. Find your dreams. Find your purpose. Be your own person. Don’t carry the burdens you don’t need. You deserve your freedom. Use this freedom to make the right decisions to improve yourself. Stop comparisons. Allow yourself to make mistakes. Find value in yourself not your appearance. Get rid of toxic people. And most important, trust your yourself.