STOP PRETENDING YOU DON'T HAVE STANDARDS

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

A happy Couple having fun pretending to be scientists in  a maize plantation /Credit/Yan Krukau 

Stop Pretending

You gain nothing by pretending to be someone you are not. You also gain nothing by pretending you have standards. You cannot see other people doing things in a certain way, and think that you are also that way.  You see other people building their lives around specific values. And they stick with those values every day. Other people have created order around their chaos. They have smooth flow. They are settled. They are peaceful. They have created something good. Something you admire. Something you want. And since you don’t have structure, you think that everyone else lacks structure. So you want to force your way into other people’s way. You begin to fight. You create tension. You begin acting as if, you know these people from somewhere. And that you know them so well that, you want to square it with them. Fight over nothing. 

You have nothing important going on for yourself. All you do is intrude other people. You are a toxic person. And you want to spread your toxicity. To people who are minding their business. People who have found what works for them. And you are not happy that they have smooth flow all the time. And since you don’t know how to communicate. You start unnecessary fights. Fights over things that do not belong to you. If, other people have created structures and things that you admire. The simplest way to get your hands on those good things is to ask. Ask how they arrived at them. Ask why they behave the way they do. Ask how you can also start behaving that way if, you like their flow. You need to find a better way to introduce yourself to other people. And that good way is not starting unnecessary tension.

The good way is not acting as if, you have an enemy. You don’t have an enemy. You need to get over your mediocrity. You need to understand that people are different. And you cannot impose your misguided views and values on other people. You don’t create villains in your head when other people don’t subscribe to your values. You don’t start hostility. Stop pretending you have standards. You don’t have standards. You don’t know what you want. You love unstructured. You don’t have order. And don’t suddenly see order and think you deserve it. Think you must be included. Think other people are paying attention to you. If, you want something, ask for it. Talk to the right people. Stop creating tension because you disapprove. You are out for a reason. Smooth operations aren’t your way.

People just created solutions that work for them. They checked around their lives and saw the kind of problems they have. And they responded with solutions that solve their problems. There is nothing above or below their motives. They were interested in solving a problem. And they found a way to solve it. That is how they created order in their lives. That is how they ended up with some level of standards. They wanted a less stressful life. They wanted their everyday operations to run in a certain way. And they found that certain way. These decisions were not about you. The decisions were meant to solve a problem. And you cannot have a problem with other people’s decisions. Decisions that are not affecting you in anyway. In fact, those decisions have resulted in something positive. Something that demonstrates that people in these place think.

Something that suggests, there is leadership. A good thing has been created in your environment. The only thing you need to do, is find out how you can benefit from it. And your way of getting your hands on a good thing is to start unnecessary tension. Tension aimed at creating negativity. Stop pretending. You don’t have standards. If, the good thing was so important to you, you should have done it yourself. But you did not do it. You were okay with dirty environments. You were okay with the noise. You were okay with mediocrity. In fact, you saw nothing wrong with being chaotic. And now that all those things have been fixed, you have a problem. You want to fight for order. When in the beginning you were just okay being average.    

And you thought that everyone is average. You thought that everyone loves chaos. That everyone does not think. That other people don’t use common sense. That is how messed up you are. Assuming things. Asserting your somewhat nonexistent values on other people. Thinking that everyone wants the same thing. That everyone wants to be foolish. That other people don’t care when there is something wrong. You are majestically misplaced. People are different. Other people are not you. People practice different things. Some people love order. And they work for it. They create standards in their lives. Standards that teach them the value of being hygienic. The value of leadership. The value of thinking. The value of solving problems. You don’t have those standards. Anything is good for you. So stop pretending that you have standards.

Stop imposing yourself in the way of other people. Stop forcing yourself into things that you don’t qualify for. Stop having problems with people you don’t know. Stop fighting ideas that you did not create. Stop being jealous. The mere fact that you did not think about it first means that it never existed in your mind. You are not a leader. You don’t know how to solve problems. You don’t know how to think. You love being in the mainstream where little change is happening. You love the noise. And order is not your thing. Value is not your thing. You are forcing yourself into them because other people are practicing them. And you think you are orderly too. That you are hygienic too. You don’t have standards. You need to admit that to yourself. You need to learn. You need to level up.   

And you are not ready to learn. You are not ready to change. You are not ready to develop standards. All you want to do is interrupt. Upset people. Stick your defiant self on other people. You want to show other people that you are defiant. That you don’t listen to simple instructions. That you have petty ego. That you cannot be spoken to by certain people. And you are not even ashamed that you are fighting over their things. The good thing you are fighting for is theirs. You were supposed to ask for permission before using it. But you did not ask for permission. You just forced your way into it. And you did not take it kindly when the owners tried to stop you. Now you have developed an attitude towards them. And you have become courageously defiant. You want to be in their face all the time. 

You are looking for an argument. You want to spread your toxicity. You want to lower other people to your nonexistent standards. So you are doing everything in your rule book. You are not moving from the things that don’t belong to you. In fact, you are destroying the good thing. You have found people who share your level of mediocrity and you are destroying the good thing. You are deliberately interfering to attract attention. You want to be engaged. You want other people to point out that you are doing wrong, when you know you are doing wrong. Your intention of encroaching is to start an argument. You want other people to know that you can talk. That you can yell.  And you are ready to drag other people down. Stop pretending. You don’t have standards. You are idle.